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You guys, I have the best FREE cheat sheet for your wedding guest list! Because here it is… the guest list talk that everyone doesn’t want to talk about yet desperately wants to know where to begin, who to invite, how many is too many, how many is too little, should I invite my boss…and his kids? The wait is over my friends, because I am here to help you nail down your dream guest list without the stress! Thats right, you heard me…no stress!

Naturally as human beings, we are all some what of people pleasers. We don’t want to hurt feelings. Especially co-workers that we see everyday and in laws! Making a guest list is no easy task. If we are being honest, it might even be one of the most stressful parts of a wedding day! However, I do not want you to feel like a stranger at your own wedding or feel that you are over spending just to please others! Which is why I am going to help you get started deciding who makes the cut and who doesn’t! Let’s dig in and start answering those tough questions!

1.) Write Down Your Immediate Family That are 100% Musts!!!

First, down with your fiance, grab a glass of wine, take a deep breath and get started! Have both you and your fiance write out the ABSOLUTE must have immediate family members that you want to attend your wedding. We are talking mom, dad, brothers, sisters, grandparents, and so on.

2.) Write down your MUST HAVE friends that will NOT be in the bridal party.

Alrighty, for this step we are purely talking about friends. Not co-workers, bosses, or your grandma’s friends. Who are your friends that didn’t make the bridal party but you truly can’t imagine not having them at your wedding? Here are some questions to think about when making this cut…

1. When was the last time you saw them? If you have not seen this person in a year or longer, or even had a good FaceTime catch up, then these people do not fall under this list.
2. Were you invited to their wedding? Don’t feel pressured to invite someone just because you were in their wedding many years ago but have since lost contact. Remember…this is YOUR day! If you have kept contact however and consider them a valuable friend, go ahead and put them down here!
3. Do you celebrate holiday’s and birthdays with/for them? If either of these answers are a yes, they should probably be invited!
4. Do you see yourself being friends even if you got a new job or moved away? Simple decision. If you say yes to this answer, write them down!! If not, maybe think about passing.
5. Would you consider changing the wedding date if this person couldn’t come? This one is simple. If the answer is yes, then they are a YES!

3.) Write Down Your Extended Family

A lot of people will tell you to divide this up evenly among you and your fiance. However, I believe that families come in all shapes and sizes and its not really fair to nail a percentage down. With that being said, this is a time to sit back, think about who you both truly WANT to be surrounded with. Now lets answer some tough questions…

1. Does this family have a big role in your life… enough to where you would be happy to look over on your big day and see them sitting in the crowd? We are starting with an easy question! If the answer to this is a yes, then they are a big yes.
2. Close with one of your cousins but not the other? This can be a tricky situation. But ask yourself, is the one extra invite worth a possible bump in the family down the road? I’d say invite them both.
3. Are these family members going to bring stress to your wedding day? This can be a tough one…if this family just happens to be family but has not put in the effort to be a part of your life… maybe even consistently bringing in stress to your life, then I’d say pass.
4. Think about the risk/reward balance. Is the decision to not inviting this family member going to cause SERIOUS rift in the family? Then you should probably invite them. If not, stand your ground and really try to think of who you WANT at your wedding. Remember, its your wedding day after all..

4.) Dive Into Your Groups… Co-Workers, Bosses, Spin Class, Small Groups

I have a few standard yes or no questions for deciding this portion. Yes is an invite, No means to leave out. Be real with yourself, and remember to focus on what is best for you and your fiance. At the end of the day, it is almost ALWAYS impossible to please everyone at the end of the day, so just remember to stay true to you and the people that matter the most to you.

1. Do you really want certain co-workers… and your boss… to see your reception celebration? Maybe one including an open bar??? Try to invite those that you socialize with even outside of the office.
2. Are you truly close enough to your friend(s) at spin class or in your small group to risk inviting them and causing tension in the group? Sometimes it is easier to look at the group as a whole and avoid hurting individual feelings.

5.) Now it is time to make some decisions!

1. Do you want children to be at the wedding? This is one that you truly have to stand your ground with if you choose not to have children at your wedding. Don’t feel bad for not making exceptions, stick to your guns! The typical age where someone is no longer considered a “child” in terms of a wedding is 12 and up. However, this number can truly be decided by you and what you are comfortable with.
2. What is the cut-off for plus ones? Think about it this way…if you truly want this person to be at your wedding and they have made the cut for all of the questions you have previously answered, do you think that they would enjoy themselves more if they were able to bring a plus one? Every person and couple is different, so try to evaluate each of these using the question in the last sentence. You got this!

6.) Lastly, Here are Some Helpful Tips!

1. Don’t do courtesy invites. Even if it is likely that someone won’t come and you just want to invite them to say you did but in reality you truly don’t want them there…just don’t invite them. When inviting people, assume that every invite is a yes. Make the tough decisions from the start that way you don’t find yourself in a situation later down the line.
2. Have a cut-off date to accept RSVP’s. Let everyone know that you are sticking to your guns with this date. You don’t want to find yourself in a situation where your budget is being blown last minute or you don’t have enough food! Let people know in advance, and stick to this rule.

Alrighty friends, there ya have it!! I hope this guide has been the most helpful to you. Remember that this day boils down to celebrating you and your new hubby or wife! Surround yourself with people you love and cherish and everything will work out! I personally want to do my best to help you guys plan your day as seamlessly as possible, why is why I have included a FREE 9 page printable download below to help you organize your wedding guest list as you make it and has space for you to take notes! When you have finished the guide you will be left with your dream guest list that you can’t wait to invite! I hope you guys enjoy your wedding guest list cheatsheet, let me know what you think in the comments below!